There were 82 television shows released in 2017.
There’s a million reasons why 2017 was a colossal shit show for everyone on planet earth but there was at least 82 reasons why it didn’t. No matter how bad things get, television shows will always be there to offer an escape. Whether it’s the good, the bad or the ugly (see what I did there? I referenced a film while talking about film. Ed Note: since the original author was too fucking lazy to write a new header, this joke no longer makes sense), television shows are an important distraction.
These are the top 5 television shows that helped distract me from the garbage fire that was 2017.
Ed Note: those numbers are completely arbitrary. He was too lazy to Google the real numbers, so he made his best guess.
I’m not going to lie to y’all but I didn’t watch that much television this year. I look at every television show as an equation where x + y = z. X= the shows length (how much movie or game time will I be sacrificing to watch it) Y= good reviews, personal recommendations or my lady wants to watch it and Z= me watching it. I’m pretty sure that’s how math works.
On paper, I probably shouldn’t have liked GLOW. I enjoyed the documentary about the Glorious Ladies Of Wrestling and I love anything involving the politics that go on behind the scenes of wrestling but I wasn’t a fan of the creators previous show (Orange is the new black is ok at best), so I was cautiously optimistic. Actually, I only put it on because my lady wanted to watch it.
It surprised me. The cast is incredible, the writing is on point and it’s faithful to the spirit of the original show. It was definitely worth skipping five movies for.
5. Game Of Thrones
It’s only taken six seasons but winter is finally here. This show is still amazing but every complaint about it is valid. Yes the quality has dipped considerably since they ran out of books to cover and yes time still doesn’t make any fucking sense on the show (which create so many goddamn plot holes it hurts the brain) but when this show is great, it’s the best thing television has ever produced.
This season was a bit of a mixed bag. On one hand, it hand a subplot that, if it had ended in any other fucking way, I would’ve dropped the show and on the other, we got some of the best action sequences of the year and it finally brought the entire cast together. So, never bad enough to leave the top five but not solid enough to be number one.
4. Samurai Jack
For years, this was always the pinnacle of animation to me. From 01-04, we were blessed with four seasons of perfection. It was the best thing on television and then it just ended. No finale or conclusion, just an ending. Apparently there was supposed to be a film that would’ve been the definitive ending to the show and a beginning of a film series but that never happened.
Jack was stuck in the past, Aku wasn’t defeated and Jack lost his sword. It was a crazy ending that, while not as shocking as the ending to Alf (the fucking FBI arrests him before he can leave earth, which concluded with a To Be Continued but it never did. That cat eating fuck rotted away in federal prison), it definitely wasn’t the ending anyone expected.
But 12 years later, much to everyone’s surprise, Jack was back. If, like me, you thought the show was perfect before, these final ten episodes are better than 95% of every animated show in existence. This show should be the example on how to bring back anything after a decade.
3. Bojack Horseman
After the rock bottom hitting finale of season 3, I was extremely curious on where the hell this show was going to go. It felt like it had written itself into a corner *cough* The Good Place *cough* but the writers clearly had an escape plan in place.
While there’s definitely no similarities between the two (outside of the Will Arnett connection), I think of this as the animated version of Arrested Development. Tonally, they couldn’t be further apart but the way each show layers jokes and the way they deal with broken human beings, my mind just connects the two together for some reason.
Which is high praise considering I think Arrested Development is the smartest written comedy of all time.
Eventually, I think Bojack might dethrone it. It’s that good.
2. Rick And Morty
It’s funny how different Bojack Horseman and Rick and Morty are to each other, yet are still in the same genre. Both animated, both comedies, both deal with an alcoholic, asshole lead character and are two of the funniest shows on tv. But in completely different ways.
Rick and Morty hardly ever use sight gags or celebrity cameos and Bojack almost never uses theme episodes. With the exception of season 3’s Fish out of Water (which was done almost completely dialogue free), Bojack is a more straight forward show and Rick and Morty are clearly more improve heavy with a strong emphasis on pop culture pastiche.
Two completely different shows with completely different writing styles that are both amazing but Rick and Morty is still clearly better in my mind. Every superlative you can throw at it applies and continues to get better with each subsequent episode.
Where the fuck did this show come from? How the hell did Noah Hawley get the budget to make this possible? Will we ever get a superhero tv show as good as this ever again?
So many questions this show raises. I seriously can’t believe this show exists. There’s no fucking way this thing should’ve worked but just like Bryan Fuller, never question the brilliance of a Noah Hawley.
He made me love Aubrey Plaza (which I always believed would be impossible), he made me love Jemaine Clement even more than I already did (which I always believed would be impossible), and provided me with my new all time favorite Bowie cover (oh you pretty things)
This is a hard second place for the best anything that even remotely resembles the X-Men film franchise. It’s a truly unique experience that couldn’t be better if it tried.
Oh and the third question was joke. This is far and away the only legitimately good live action superhero tv show. Everything else is a soap opera with capes but this easily could’ve been a film.